Snatch Wars

I Like Watches

And Vodka.

Thursday is the start of my weekend and I have 

cracked open my first bottle of the weekend. 

As I am a partime alcoholic

 

(Thursdays to Sunday only)

I'll get through 2 or maybe 3 bottles of Smirnoff and a few tins

of Red Bull.

Police Brutality

Ms Fisher, 35, who works at an animal sanctuary and lives in Brighton, told the Daily Mail: “I had gone to protest about climate change. That’s my main thing. I really love animals and that’s what I’m worried about"

"Ms Fisher is reported to be trying to sell her story for £50,000, having hired Max Clifford, the publicist"

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6101919.ece

My heart bleeds for her, poor wee soul. These protesters with the dodgy woolly hats should think themselves lucky. I'll bet they wouldn't be so keen to impede these guys carrying out their duties.

Essex Police

I read this comment in one yesterdays papers from a spokesman for Essex Police trying to justify the use of high performance Subaru patrol cars.

He added "The fact that they're rally type cars allows them to be fixed quickly when dangerous motorists hit them"

Yeah Right, this lot doesn't look like it had much help from the dangerous motorist. Pity they weren't driving a rally car at the time.

I like watches

And Big M is a bit of a Buddhist, I'm not sure which bit but who am I to argue. 

Fat Bastards

I was on the bus the other day and at one stop a big fat bint got on, she was a good 20 stone. The bus was busy and for some reason she decided to plonk her fat arse down beside me squeezing up against the window with no apoligy what so ever. I very politely enquired if she had purchased one or two tickets only to be met by a scowel from her and disaprroving tuts from some of the surrounding passengers.

Now whilst I don't doubt that in some cases there may be a medical reason 95% of the time YOUV'E JUST ATE TO MANY PIES !!!!!! so if you want to use public transport buy two fucking tickets and if there aren't any double seats left wait for the next fucking bus !!!!

'Fragile' Jack on suicide lag wing

"Mr Wilkins told the trial in Epping that he picked up Tweed and three other people in Epping in the early hours of May 5 last year.

He said Tweed became aggressive after being asked to pay the fare in advance.

Mr Wilkins said Tweed, who was sitting behind him, grabbed him in a headlock and threatened to stab him.

"I have, as a taxi driver, picked up a lot of people who are aggressive but never as aggressive as this," he said.

Tweed told police he had been drinking all day before going to a club where he drank 10 vodka and Red Bulls plus a couple of shots"

Fragile My Arse, 

He wasn't that fragile when he was trying to strangle

the taxi driver, it should have been 12 months

instead of 12 weeks.

 

And he's a pussy if he can only manage

10 Vodka Red bulls in a day.